Faking it 'til I Make it

On Friday, I willingly signed up for two writing events in the south this fall.

I'd like to say that the easy access to grits and sweet tea had no impact on the decision, but then I'd be lying. And what is this (at times, rambling mess of a) blog if it's not a place where I can share my truth?

We just got back from a bucket list trip for my grandma. It was a lot of fun, but we're honestly all a LITTLE BIT sick of each other by now.

Why? Well, in a little under 2 weeks, we (my extroverted sister, my extroverted "a stranger is just a friend you haven't met yet" grandma, and my introverted self) traveled by car (the extroverts don't like planes) across half the country. We went from Hutchinson, KS, to Amarillo, Texas, then to Flagstaff and Phoenix, AZ, then to San Diego, CA, then two days in Las Vegas, NV (my personal hell), and then Vail, CO, before returning to Hutchinson on Thursday.

For those keeping track at home, the trip to the furthest point (San Diego <3) took 3 days of driving to make sure grandma (and, let's be honest, my old ass) could still move the next day. That's six days in the car. Together. For upwards of six hours at a time.

Surprisingly, we're all still alive.

But while we were talking about the trip, my grandma mentioned that another bucket list item is to see Nashville again. She really wants to go to the 100-year celebration of the Grand Ole Opry, which happens in August.

You know what else happens that same week? Oh, just writing event #1.

Killer Nashville International Writers' Conference.

I've helped as a first-round judge for Killer Nashville's Claymore Awardfor the last 3 years. The contest is for the first 50 pages of an unpublished novel and is honestly a lot of fun to judge. A couple of the entries I read were engaging enough that I was upset when I reached page 50. I can only hope those novels reach publication so I can finish them. It's honestly the worst kind of tease to never know whodunnit.

The conference itself has Masterclasses (I'm signed up for Forensics for Writers, which is led by Mary Jumbelic), agent roundtables, and workshops. I'm hoping to have the latest draft of my novel finished and sent off to my dream agent by then. Writing conferences inspire me to write new things, so I want the chance to work on something different while/after I'm there.

Writing event #2 is in New Orleans in September. Bouchercon.

An explanation of the convention from their website: "Bouchercon® is the annual world mystery convention where every year readers, writers, publishers, editors, agents, booksellers and other lovers of crime fiction gather for a 4-day weekend of education, entertainment, and fun!"

From what I've heard from all the friends who've influenced me to go (Dennis K Crosby, J.A. Jensen, KC Grifant, and Jonathan Maberry, to name a few), it's a well-run conference that everyone enjoys.

If my book were already published, it would be an impactful convention for me as they have a Debut Mystery Author Breakfast where authors can speak about their work with readers. Even unpublished, the convention allows the chance to interact with the audience for our books in the future.

And, let's be honest, the opportunity to visit New Orleans once in my life is one I couldn't possibly pass up.

When I prepare for events as a writer, there is a fair amount of imposter syndrome going on in my head. Honestly, my brain is often a scary place for anyone to visit as the self doubt is, at times, crippling. But as I prepare for these events, I'm going to take a page out of my own book (well, blog post) and volunteer, build in bed rot time, and find a convention buddy.

Above all else, I'll remember that most of the people I'm meeting have, or have had, the same doubts about their own writing careers. If they can put themselves out there and persist against the odds, there is no reason for me not to do so as well.

And maybe, just maybe, one day I'll attend one of these events with a copy of my own published book in hand. Until then, I hope to learn, to listen, and to make a few new writer friends who are also going through that desert of writing uncertainty.